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Thursday, August 18, 2011

Feeding Your Foster Child


This is a photo comparison of Jayden the month he came home (two and a half years old), and him 9 months later. The skin color difference is because of the flash on my camera lightening up the April photo, and the fact that he is darker in the summer.

But what I wanted to point out is his size difference. He has only gained 2 lbs. in a year and that is because of height. Which means he actually lost body fat. When he came home, he was accustomed to a diet of fast food burgers and burritos, ramen noodles, chips and soda. His teeth were literally rotting in his mouth...poor baby. And he was chubby.

My friend recently welcomed home her first foster kids, and the toddler boy is thick as well. His mother stated that he only liked to eat cold hotdogs and vienna sausages. Lovely! So she is working through getting him to eat a wide range of foods. Plus, he is hungry all the time and will cry for more food even when she has fed him plenty.

My advice to her and anyone welcoming a toddler into their home from state foster care, is to expect that they will have food issues. They may eat every thing in sight (Isaac) due to the fact they they were deprived. OR they may reject everything but mac n' cheese and chicken nuggets. Both my boys had to get acquainted with fruits and vegetables. Isaac was 16 months old, and even though he ate every thing I put on his highchair tray, and cried when it was gone, fruit reacted to his digestive system in a bad way for about a week as his body adjusted to fiber, so I had to introduce it slowly. Jayden flat out refused all fresh food. With him, I would give him the food I desired for him to eat first in a small portion with nothing else on his plate. When he finished it, I gave him the food he was more comfortable eating (anything soft...lasagna, pancakes, noodles). I slowly phased out foods that were not nutritious. For example, he loved cereal. He would eat it all day long. So I mixed what he liked (sugar cereal) with Kix a bowl at a time until I ran out of the sugar cereal and he was great with the Kix. Then I never bought the sugar cereal again. I did the same with fruits and vegetables...starting with soft canned and gradually introducing fresh/raw/steamed.

A year later, Jayden hardly refuses anything. There are things he doesn't like (eggs in any form) and will push around on his plate. But we don't have any food battles. Some things I dropped cold turkey (soda in favor of skim milk)...and other things I waited a month or two to let him have again (burgers and a few fries). Kids are very resilient and adjust quickly if you are consistently giving the healthy foods. I don't limit quantities with my boys because what they are eating is nutritionally solid. I only limit portions on junk food, treats, and carb snacks. Jayden was also anemic so it was imperative that he receive iron rich foods and vitamin C foods to be healthy. I didn't want to put him on an iron supplement if I could avoid it. For awhile I had to hide the "good" stuff inside foods he already liked...veggie Quesadillas, lasagna, sweet potato puree in pancakes, etc. But now he will take most things fresh and raw.

We have come a long way!

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

My Sprout


We have a farmer's market store chain in our area called Sprouts. Today was the grand opening of the closest store to our house. They were advertising all kinds of sales, free reusable bags, and drawings. So...I thought why not load up 4 kids aged 6 and under and head out there? Good thing for the Moby wrap and a really friendly lady in front of me in line, because our wait time to check out was a bit over 30 minutes. Fun times, Y'all.

We talk a lot about how food powers your body and sharpens your mind, so Isaac being our oldest is usually our junk food police, "Mom, isn't diet dr. pepper still soda. And isn't soda bad for you?" "Dad, are you sure you want to eat that bag of Doritos. That is just junk." Sometimes it is cute (like when he turns down icecream at a birthday party) and sometimes it is flat out annoying.

Recently it has been BOTH at the same time. Isaac decided one day that he wanted to try brussel sprouts. I guess he heard about their super powers from somewhere...I don't know. But I have never eaten them and was not so ready to give it a try. When I would come back from the store he would accost me with where was his sprout. To which I would roll my eyes and walk past him. The thought of cooking up a batch that I am convinced my kids will turn their nose up to, is not my idea of a successful dinner time. But I have to say I did cave. Last week at the Sprouts I had been going to, the kids and Billy were with me on a rare family shopping trip. Isaac went straight for the produce section in search of his treasure. When I went to check out, the clerk said "Only one brussel sprout?" I nodded and explained my oldest's fixation with the vegetable and my refusal to commit to entire side dish. "Huh," he said as he bagged it.

Daily Isaac has asked for this sprout and I do not know how to fix the thing, so I continue to put it off as it dries out in our produce drawer.

That brings us to today and the grand opening of the appropriately named "Sprouts". I was digging in the freezer bin snatching up every single bag of frozen vegetables as they were a $1 a bag. Isaac says loudly, "Mom, what about the brussel sprouts?!! I can have them as a snack today!" Oh Good Lord. I looked around at moms literally with their mouth open and a perplexed look on their faces. I joked "Most kids want a bag of M & M's. Mine wants a bag of brussel sprouts! Go figure!" One mom in particular thought it was just "wonderful" and so I asked her how on earth I should cook, season, and serve these bad boys to my kids. I thanked her for her advice and moved on with the coveted bag in my cart, and a smiling 6 year old.

So tonight it looks like we are having brussel sprouts with dinner. woohoo.

Can you hear my enthusiasm?

I thought it appropriate that Isaac was wearing his Super Man t-shirt when this all went down.

Monday, August 15, 2011

Adoption Gifts

I wanted to share some of the personalized gifts Jayden got for his adoption.
Giving something that has his name on it was so special because we didn't have him from birth. So having more things around the house that he can claim and that I can save for his memory box, the better!

My friend, Shelly mailed him this book that has his name through out it.
It is from the company, I See Me.

It is really sweet and a wonderful keepsake!

The next thing is, my friend Lisa gave him a cute wooden toy with his name painted on it.
I love this! He plays with it everyday so it is very practical, but it will also be kept forever for him as a memory of his adoption and his childhood.

And finally, the last personalized gift was a recordable photo album given from my sister, from Hallmark. We put photos of his adoption day and party in there and on each page recorded what was happening and who was in the photo. As he turns the pages, it reads the captions you recorded. This will be a great way for us all to remember that special day!


Adopting a child from foster care who is older means they in many ways lose those months/years that they were not home with you. Anyway to make them feel like they belonged here all along...were loved and waited for...will help them to sort the pieces of their life when they are older. Thank you for the very thoughtful gifts, friends!

Saturday, August 13, 2011

birthday

Next Friday I will turn 33 years old.

I am not sure how exactly I feel about this, if anything at all.

My birthday has never been met with much fanfare. It comes, I eat cake, I open the few cards and gifts that arrive and 24 hours later it is over and I am officially a year older. This year and the months proceeding my 32nd birthday...last summer.... have been a time of some real life changes. I have lost relationships that were dear to me, and in the midst of that have had to discover realities about life and love and family and friendships. It has been a year of pain and self discovery. It has been a year where I have had to say to God time and time again, "please carry me through this." And He did.
He brought a new church family into our lives, that have unknowingly ministered to my hurting heart. They have accepted me when I wasn't sure I was acceptable or had much to offer. Sure...I still carry with me the fear of abandonment I feel in every relationship, the thoughts of "things are good now...but they won't stick around forever." But I have had to step out in faith and trust that God has us right here for His purpose and glory, not my own.

I have had health issues this year that are still a problem and concern for me, even though the Dr's don't really know why my body is doing what it is doing. It doesn't scare me...it is a nuisance. There is too much life to live to be worried about what I can't control.

BUT despite the hardships I have faced in the past 12 months since I turned another year older, this year has brought about some of the greatest joys of my life. I could not have ever known that I would become the mother to TWO more precious children in a year's time. When motherhood does not come easy, you do not ever take for granted a family addition. At the beginning of last summer, I was the mother of a son and a daughter. This summer I am the mother of another son and a daughter. Four children. Four.
My cup really does runneth over with blessings upon blessings.

So this birthday, I will not remain focused on my failures and my short comings. I will focus on the way that my God continues to provide for me and love me in a way that is above and beyond any love I will ever feel on this earth. God's perfect, accepting, never ending, unselfish, pure and patient love.

Nothing can match it.

But I will say, the love of these two most perfect of birthday gifts... sure come close.

Friday, August 12, 2011

The Baby's Baby



I ordered Jasmine a baby doll and it arrived today.

The doll is an infant safe, soft body... has a rattle sound, and "crinkly" sounding feet.

She loved it immediately and was all smiles!
























Taking her first taste.

















Do we look alike?















She was flipping the doll around and giggling!















"Come here you little cutie..."

















"Thanks, Mom!"

Hawaiian Falls





For Christmas, the kids and I were given water park season passes. There are 3 within driving distance of 30 minutes or less (one is across the street from our neighborhood!)

So we have been 7 times now!! Yesterday we went to one we had not been to before. It was a lot of fun. My friend who is our pastor's wife kept Jasmine. Her 3 kids were super excited to have her. I am SO happy to have such a wonderful church family. Someone different has kept the baby every time we went. We are hoping to fit in 1-2 more trips before they close for the season on Labor Day.