The Child Who Changed It All

 

Those who know this little fire pistol know that God has given me a particular challenge when he gifted me with this child.

 

I had gotten quite cocky in my parenting style.

People would praise how well behaved my children were when we went places. I smiled in pride and thanked them.

 

I judged other moms whose children were out of control.

Tsk...if only those mothers were strong enough to stand up to their children. If only they understood the importance of discipline and boundaries in a child's life.

 

 If only they were as good at this mothering thing as I am.

 

Okay, maybe these thoughts were not so strong...but it was certainly the underlying belief system I held.

 

Well...not anymore.

This child tantrums and hits and pushes and bites.

She pitches fits about having to take a bath, and then pitches the same fit about having to get out.

She wants to buckle her own seatbelt, sit in only a double cart at the grocery store, and eat off my plate instead of the exact same food on hers.

 

She pees her pants when she is mad at me.

She pitches a fit if the tv is displaying anything but Barney.

She tripped me at a restaurant and caused dark bruises all down my knees and legs that are still healing.

 

She pushes her friends and siblings.

She is generally naughty.

All. The. Time.

 

She is the classic Strong Willed Child, according to James Dobson.

 

She has changed how I feel about parenting.

 

When I see a child in a store raging, I am no longer annoyed at that mother. I now try to make eye contact. To smile an exhausted smile of sympathy back that says, "Yeah. Me too."

 

I try to remember this quote:

 

Maybe your hard battle is your child, like mine is.

 

Maybe your battle is in finding joy in the mundane drudgery of raising children and managing a household, while trying to take care of your husband and yourself.

 

Maybe it is financial, been there.

Maybe it is relational...been there too.

 

Whatever it is, lets remember our fellow sisters in motherhood are fighting their hard battles too.

 

May the Father who created us and saved us, sustain us in fighting the good fight.

 

Our families depend on it.

 

In the meantime, I will continue to wage war with my daughter's will.

For her benefit and God's glory.

 

One day, we will sit around and laugh about the havoc she brought with her in toddlerhood. And we will admire how much she has grown and changed.

 

One day I will miss her little two year old body, her broken sentences and obsession with a big purple dinosaur.

 

One day she will grow up and be gone.

On that day, I will give anything to have one more wild fit. To hold on a little longer to the squirmy, strong body that so wants to have her own way in this world.

 

A friend said to me, "she is destined for greatness".

 

I will claim that and believe it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



One Year

July 13th marked one year since our teenage son came home. I am not sure what to make of this milestone in our family. It has been a journey unlike any other we have taken in parenting. There is no class that can prepare you for what it is like to parent a child you didn't raise, and no two experiences are the same.

We have prayed and cried and rejoiced over this boy. We have had angry transactions between us. We have seen victory over his past. We have seen great changes and at the same time are grieved in much of the same ways we were when he first arrived.

I have learned how to come at him and how not to, in confrontation. I have learned that I have to be more accepting of behaviors and attitude than I planned on being.

I have seen that I am stronger than at first I felt.

Our son exhausts us and elates us, and he would do all this if he were our only, but he is not. He is one of five, and yet takes up so much of our mind space and efforts. Adopting a teenager from foster care is certainly NOT for the faint of heart.

Due to a pretty big altercation we had at the beginning of the summer, we have called the troops in...in the form of a mentor at our church. This is a black man who was raised in a very, very violent and impoverished ghetto. He self professes to have done some bad things in his life, yet when Jesus took ahold of him years ago it all changed. He and his wife have been to our house several times now. He always speaks a firm word of truth to Keishun. When he first met me, he said how he could see God had hand picked me for this boy because I was not going to be intimidated or pushed around. I told him I was born for such a role as this. My fiestiness comes in handy on a daily basis.

I can say in this year, this child who once called me Ms. Laurie has become very much my son and I his Mom. I have been to the school fighting on his behalf. I have shed tears when he was in trouble. I have made phone calls and emails. I have fought for him and with him and will continue to do so.

We have been blessed by this life.

I took this picture with my cell phone cam. It illustrates perfectly my childhood dream to have a large kitchen table filled up with happy children.  I thank God for making my dreams come true in His way.

This Week

This past week was full of adventures.

I organized our pantry for starters, and told Billy he would need to go through a "pantry orientation". He laughed about that.

We are both thrilled that we can now find everything we want in our pantry, quickly and efficiently.

 

Last weekend, we finally traded in our beat up van, we had driven that thing into the ground. I found a Nissan Quest at CarMax in Oklahoma City. They did a free transfer, we waited a week and then went and picked it up!!

 

 

I cannot express how much I LOVE this van.

Check out this cool backside.

 

It has a keyless ignition which has been fabulous...no more searching for my keys at the bottom of my purse!

As long as they are within a certain perimeter of the car, I can unlock and lock the doors with just a push of an outside button and easily start the car once I am in it.

 

One of the very best features is the trunk space. It is huge and has a very deep hole underneath the floorboard for more storage. LOVE.

 

This is going to help us a ton on our road trips.

 

Since receiving my very first smart phone a few months ago, I noticed I have not been taking as many pictures with my big camera. Which in turn, does not lend itself to keeping up with the blog very well. So I thought I might start a series called:

 

This Week On Facebook

 

That is where all of my camera pics end up anyway!

So here is the first installment...

 

The week started with our monthly loooong drive out to Keishun's orthodontist that he has been going to for 18 months now. We are hoping to have those braces off by Christmas.

 

On the way, Jasmine of course needed to pee.

So I exited the highway and thankfully had her travel potty tucked safely in the trunk of the new van.

When you gotta go, you gotta go!

 Mid week we went to LEGOLAND with some friends. This will be a post for another day, it was sooo much fun.

 

This weekend we had a garage sale.

I kicked it on the signs and we made $200. Woohoo.

 

This accomplished several things, We were able to make some money for necessary new home items. We cleaned out the garage enabling me for the first time EVER to park in there. And, we were able to organize my bulk shopping stash. This is necessary to keep up with in a big family. Running out of toilet paper in a house with 7 people and 3 bathrooms is not a fun time for anyone.

 

Also this weekend, the boys cousin Terrance stayed with us from Friday dinner to Sunday church.

They enjoyed movie night in our upstairs family area.

I of course had to make it special with movie snacks.

 

The next day we finally made use of our HOA fees by swimming in our community pool which is just one street over.

 It is greatness.

It includes covered picnic benches and a toddler pool.  It also has a big swimming pool connected to a smaller deep end with slides.

 

There are lifeguards to make sure everyone behaves themselves.

 

We had a blast.

 

So there you have it, a sampling of this week on Facebook.

With only 5 weeks of summer vacation left, I am going to have to get busy at that bucket list with the kids.

 

Master Bathroom

This is my last renovation for awhile. I promise.

We are finally feeling settled in our house and looking forward to company in a few weeks!

As part of our "get-rid-of-the-wall-paper-fast" mission, 

we fixed up the master bathroom.

When we moved in, it looked like this:

So many stripes.

So much brass.

We asked the painters to please take down the giant builder grade mirror and brass light fixtures (and towel bar). 

They then applied a slate grey paint color to the walls.

Billy hung these adorable individual mirrors and silver light fixtures.

We added a towel ring. I decorated, and Viola!

Even the private toilet room got a makeover.

 I will likely hang the blue flower decor on the wall in there, and get a big art piece for above the tub. 

I am also on the hunt for a chevron grey valance to hang above the window. Let me know if you see one around! :)

Speaking of the tub.

I had not taken a bath in over 5 years, because the bathroom accommodations in our previous locations did not allow for a comfortable bath...showers only.

But this beauty sure does...

The kids are big fans of the jets. :)

The bathroom has a linen closet AND my walk-in.

Billy's own walk-in closet is in our bedroom.

I found these great fabric bins to put in the linen closet.

 

I have plans to turn my closet into a dressing room complete with a chair and lamp. My dresser is already in there.

And of course it has become a catch all of other things...

As the manager of a big family, there are times I just need to retreat.

This bathroom is two doors between me and little people.

Nice. :)

I am in love with how this make-over turned out:

Bookshelf Makeover

This is what Billy came out to me doing at 6:30 this morning.

He is used to the fact that when I get something in my head, it has to happen NOW.

What I had in my head was that I needed to lighten up this:

 It was just too much black all in one place.

I ordered some chevron wrapping paper off Etsy for just this project~

I knew I wanted to paper the back of the bookshelves in chevron, and this grey and white is the perfect combo.

So I started by clearing everything off and removing the shelves, except for the shelf that is permanent.

Then I got to measuring and cutting, using my tile floor as a guide for cutting a straight line.

 I did have some company. :)

Layed out the double sided sticky tape:

And the end result:

Beautiful.

Now in the spirit of keeping it real for you folks...

this was not as easy as it looks. 

My cutting was not so exact. 

My measurements were off.

It was not the right width to cover all my space.

Bleck.

 

But as my loving husband coached me,

"It won't matter once everything is on there."

And he was right.

I love the outcome.

Next project:

The Master Bathroom

Galveston and the 4th

We had a great 4th of July weekend.

We were in Houston, Tx to visit Billy's parents and sister.

 For fireworks, we drove to Kemah which is very 

close to where we were.

 

We found a less crowded spot near the water.

The fireworks were perfectly aligned in front of us.

While in Houston, we also went to see Monsters University in 3D with Nana, and Despicable Me 2.

On the 5th, we drove down to Galveston for a fun day at the beach and lunch at Joe's Crab Shack.

We enjoyed our mini vacation.

 It will be the only one we will get this summer because of our move into the new house, so we made the most of it.