"Adopt-a" Programs

I am going to take a little break in the festive Christmas posts to rant a bit. Ya'll have missed my rants, right?!

Next week at school, all the classes are gathering gifts and donations from families in their class to give Christmas presents to a child in foster care. We all have specific children with their ages and requests. Our director typed a note to send home to the parents and the letter says, "Each class has adopted a foster child this year to provide gifts for." Really? Each class has adopted a foster child? Now clearly what she meant to say was each class will be sponsoring a foster child's Christmas. Adoption is final and forever, not one holiday that you buy some clothes and a book for a 12 year old. You might be thinking as you read this that I am being petty about this issue but it just eats me up to hear this phrasing. How am I supposed to explain the concept of how my children came to be mine with the way people flipantly use this word? I was at Family Christian Bookstore two days ago and the kids and I were at the cash register where a video was playing of children in Africa walking with jugs on their heads. I explained to Isaac that they had to walk miles to get water for their families and how lucky we are that our water is in our home. The cashier said "you know you can adopt one of these children for $30 a month!" I wanted to say, "adopting one of these children would cost a whole lot more than 30 bucks a month." but what I said was,"is that the way the organization describes this program? Adopting a child?" now clearly she could look down at Isaac and see that he is not biologically mine yet was calling me Mom and she said "No, that's just me. Sorry." I just smiled to let her off the hook, but inside I was so annoyed.

And today to go to school and read this? Even more shocking is that our director has been a foster parent for more than 10 years. I don't mean to be obnoxious about this, but she should know better. She really should. Here is the definition of "adopting" from dictionary.com:


(ə-dŏpt') Pronunciation Key tr.v. a·dopt·ed, a·dopt·ing, a·dopts
1. To take into one's family through legal means and raise as one's own child.
2. a.To take and follow (a course of action, for example) by choice or assent: adopt a new technique.
b. To take up and make one's own: adopt a new idea.
3.To take on or assume: adopted an air of importance.
4.To vote to accept: adopt a resolution.
5.To choose as standard or required in a course: adopt a new line of English textbooks.

No where in that definition does it describe financially supporting a person, team, highway, library, zoo animal, or tree temporarily. The appropriate term for that is to sponsor.

Adoption is relational and it is forever. And yes, the use of this term matters! Adoptive Families Magazine has an article on this topic that is really good. Please take the time to read 'Adopt-a Programs' Diminish Our Families.

This is a subject that often comes up with Billy and I and it is SO important that those in our lives be on the same page about this.